


I’m Sorry

by ashleybenlove



Category: Toy Story (Movies)
Genre: Character Death, Community: disney_kink, F/M, Imagine your OTP
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-20
Updated: 2018-06-20
Packaged: 2019-05-26 06:25:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14994782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashleybenlove/pseuds/ashleybenlove
Summary: But then she went to her doctor to get a full physical. Expecting to get a clean bill of health, her plans for the future with Buzz were shattered when she was told that she was dying.





	I’m Sorry

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Family Pride](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/390377) by poetLaurie. 



> I originally posted this anonymously in October 2012 on the Disney Kink Meme for the prompt: "Buzz and Jessie break up. They don't get back together."
> 
> I cited the inspired by fanfic because when I posted the fic I noted that it probably influenced the whole “wanting to marry her, but she breaks up with him before he does anything” thing.
> 
> Also, this [Imagine Your OTP](http://imagineyourotp.tumblr.com/post/33795629013/imagine-person-a-breaking-up-with-person-b-for-an) post inspired this fanfic: "Imagine Person A breaking up with Person B for an unexplained reason. Person B later finds out that Person A has died away from a rare disease. Person A had broken up with Person B because they didn’t want their loved one to see them wither away."

Buzz was in love with Jessie. He wanted to marry her, of that he was sure. Buzz had yet to announce that he wanted to marry her or had proposed, but he was quite devoted to her. He told her he loved her, and they had been together for just over three years. He had suggested more than once they move into together. She had politely refused, presumably not ready for that.

Jessie knew he was serious about their relationship. She had figured he wanted to marry her. It was implicit from how he acted and how he treated her. Plus, after three years, they were more than just dating, it was a serious relationship. She had been fine with that premise that he wanted to marry her, and had figured that she wanted to marry him someday, maybe within the next year or two. 

But then she went to her doctor to get a full physical. Expecting to get a clean bill of health, her plans for the future with Buzz were shattered when she was told that she was dying. She had at most six months left. 

She was dying.

Buzz couldn’t know. Not until after she had passed. She loved him so much that she couldn’t bear to put him through that. She didn’t want him to have to suffer through the inevitability of her death. Watching her die would be too much for him. She didn’t want him to have to see her die. 

The idea of him having to watch her die over the next six months made her cry more than knowing that she was going to die. She did not want to hurt him. He loved her so much and she loved him so much. But she was not to be around for very long. She would have to hurt him. She did not want to do it but the only solution was to break up with him. Soon.

She would then proceed to make plans to take care of her affairs before and after her death.

They were together for a few days longer after she found out her prognosis, with Jessie saying goodbye to him in her own way and attempting to let him go. She made sure to let him know that whatever was to happen in the future, she loved him. 

She then broke up with him. She was as kind as she could be about it. She did not provide an explanation to him as to why except for the clichéd (but in her case quite true if one considered her rationale) “It’s not you, it’s me.” He was understanding but upset about it.

“I’ll still love you,” Buzz promised.

She had to force herself not to break down and weep in front of him and tell him why she was leaving him exactly. So she said, “I understand.”

Buzz took the break up hard. He wanted to be with her for a long time, and had wanted to marry her and maybe have a family. But she had ended their relationship. Respecting her boundaries, he chose not to have contact with her and tried to get on with his life, but not quite ready to get back into a relationship yet. 

Six months passed after their breakup when Buzz read something in the paper that punched him in the gut, that he required that he read multiple times to make sure he was not misreading it, each time it hurting him even more. 

Jessie’s name and picture was in the obituary section. She had died. At only 33. 

All he could wonder was what happened? She seemed so healthy at the time they broke up. How could she have died in the six months since? He didn’t know if he could get the answers from going to her funeral, but he felt like it would make him feel better to say goodbye to her at the ceremony conducted to do just that. He still loved her after all. Her death affected him deeply. 

So he went to her funeral, sitting in a pew in the very back, his head bowed down tears flowing silently, mourning that she was gone. 

When it was over, as he was leaving was stopped by a gentleman in a suit, realizing before the guy said anything that the man was a lawyer. Just the way the guy presented himself, and the fact that he was holding a binder in his arms.

“Mr. Lightyear?” he asked.

“Yes?” Buzz replied, sniffing, wiping his eyes.

“Preston Prickle,” he said. “I was Jessie Nesbitt’s lawyer. I’m sorry for your loss.”

Buzz nodded. “Thank you, Mr. Prickle,” he replied. 

“Would you come with me to my office? We have much to talk about,” Preston Prickle requested.

Buzz agreed. 

“What is this about?” Buzz asked, as he sat down in a chair in the man’s office. He wiped his face.

Preston set a tissue box in front of Buzz, as he sat down across from him.

“Miss Nesbitt left me specific instructions to get into contact with you soon after she died,” Preston replied. 

Buzz sighed and said, “So, she knew she was going to die?” He sighed shakily and then asked, just as shakily, “How did she die?” 

“Yes, she knew. She had about six months advance notice that she was going to die from a terminal illness.” 

Buzz nodded, not sure what to say. 

“Miss Nesbitt asked that you receive this,” Preston told him. He handed Buzz an envelope. 

“Thank you,” Buzz replied, numbly, taking the envelope. 

“Again, I’m very sorry for your loss, Mr. Lightyear,” Preston said. 

“Thank you,” Buzz replied. 

Back at home, he held the envelope in his hands, staring at it. He recognized her handwriting on it in the way she wrote his name over the course of their relationship. He took a great sigh, his heart hurting and trying not to cry more, and carefully opened the envelope, pulling out the letter inside. 

It was handwritten and it read:

_Buzz,_

_If you are reading this, I have died. I want you to know how sorry I am. For the pain you are likely feeling right now and for leaving you. Had I a choice, I would have done neither. I was dying and I wanted to spare you the pain of having to see me die over a half year. I know that regardless, you would have been in pain, and I wanted to spare you at least some of it. For your pain, I am deeply sorry, Buzz. Please know that even though I ended our relationship, I love you greatly. And the time I spent with you was wonderful. You are a great man._

_I hope that you find love again. You certainly deserve it. You deserve the life that you must have wanted to share with me._

_I love you,_

_Jessie_


End file.
